THE DIARY OF A PORN ADDICT (Written by Lizzy Oyebola Yakubu)

As I faced the demon possessed girl who had started sweating profusely and was charging at me as if to attack, I shifted backwards, looked at the other fellowship executives who were looking so scared.

“If Almighty Daniel could shift back from this thing, who are we” kind of look was their faces. I was so scared.

This is the last Friday of the month and we usually hold vigils but this is turning to something I cannot handle.

This same Angelina girl had manifested when Nationwide Known Pastor, Pastor Ambode preached at the last revival service last month. She chased him off the podium.

I was to lead a session of the prayer as I was always asked to do every time there was a vigil, there was no chaplain around, no elderly ones around. It was just the school fellowship executives and the other students.

I said some few words of prayer, suddenly, Angelina started manifesting.

I almost retreated but I found myself walking towards her while I kept praying in the Spirit.

“Who are you to stop me” She shouted to the extent that the chapel reverberated. I shuddered.

“God, I can’t do this. No, please” I muttered to myself, fumbling with my pocket to get an handkerchief to mop the beads of sweat forming on my face. My tears mixed with the sweat and together they made a concoction of mess on my good looking face.

The chapel was in chaos! I was embarrassed; I was ashamed, it had never happened before! God had always used me.

People even looked forward to the time that I preached and prayed because they were always blessed.

So, what is this?

As she made at me almost landing a punch on my chin, I fell on the cold tiles and screamed.

“Holy Ghost, have mercy upon me. You can put me to shame for who am i! But please Lord; don’t put your name to shame.”

She started screaming “Noooo!” she rolled on the floor like a spinner.

I looked at the chapel and I saw there was calmness now and people were praying seriously.

I looked up and strength from nowhere came.

I rushed to the girl, knelt beside her and with a roaring voice, I said; “Listen up, you evil spirit! Enough is enough that you have tormented this girl. Right now, I command you, out!” as I screamed the out!,

She shook vehemently and started foaming.

“In the name of Jesus…Out!”

“I will leave! I will go! I will!” She screamed more, looking so distressed.

“Now is the time. Leave her now in the Name of Jesus. Leave her and enter no one here but go into the sea to go and perish there.” I cried out in a way that even shook me. I fell to my face.

“I leave now. I concur. Daniel, we respect you” and with that statement, she went still and normalized.

The chapel gave a thunderous applause. Some were on their knees, some were crying.

I didn’t know what to do.

I didn’t believe what I heard.

“Daniel, we respect you” I started crying. It was not a silent cry. It was open, loud and shaking.

“Lord, I don’t deserve it, Lord I don’t. Oh why Lord!”

No one understood why I cried.

Some thought it was out of humility.

Others thought I was appreciative and all.

Yes I was appreciative but it was more than that.

I had a poisonous dose I took every day.

I knew it kills and I knew it made me less active though it pleased me anytime I took it, I took it anyway.

No matter the day, after fast, during fast, after prayers, in my prayer room, after counseling drug addicts and all, I must take that dose.

If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be okay.

It is a popular drug and it’s popularly known as the ‘drug of the new millennium’.

It is far more addictive and destructive than hard drugs and heroine, working in the same way as a chemical drug but only with more power because it deals with carnal thoughts and behaviors.

It takes over a person’s thinking- pornography!

It’s a sin! It’s evil! It’s dirty! Its internet adultery!

The messages I had preached against pornography at seminars, relationship symposia started to ring in my head even as I prepared for the vigil prayer in the morning.

While praying, the urge started talking to me, telling me to stand and take a dose again.

I really didn’t know what to do as the Holy Spirit took over. It was a tug of war.

Calmly, the Spirit said “Don’t” but the urge from the enemy was much.

I picked up my system. “I won’t do it. I promise” I said to myself.

I went to the hidden folder I had created under Microsoft Encarta application. I saved it with “The End Times-Beware”! I shook my head sadly. Who am I deceiving?

“God, why is this thing ruling me? Why can’t I say ‘no’? Why can’t I resist?” I clicked on it and five minutes was enough to take the dose for the day.

Micah 7:8 took over as I cried and prayed hard before preparing for the programme.

Now getting to the programme, God still honored himself through me.

My goodness! What have I done to deserve this?

Why is he still so good to me?

Why hasn’t He destroyed me as He destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah? Why Lord?

I wept like the doses of porn I had watched since 5 years ago when the wahala started could come out through the ocean of my tears.

I consecrated myself to God again, over and over again.

I really do wish to stay in His presence, never to move out, never to set my eyes on the media, never to have anything to do with anyone except God.

I knew that if I could miss a dose, one day, my freedom was very near. But can i?

Hmmmm…how many of us can relate with what Mr. Daniel is passing through.

God uses us so much and yet, no one knows what is happening to us.

This isn’t just a story coming your path, it’s a Word from the Lord saying, you have stayed long enough, come back home. You can be free.

If you have never looked at porn, (seeing is really different from looking. You can see something briefly as it pops up when you are trying to send a mail and all but once you click and start looking, then, it’s another thing.), the best way to stop pornography in its tracks is never to start!

Don’t be deceived, over 90% of Christians in the world watch porn and have self sex (Masturbation).

Even your pastor could be!

Your dad, your trusted son or daughter, your mum, your miracle working fellowship leaders, all could be under this spell blanket.
Erotic novels, erotic movies are all evil!

Christians are the most vulnerable! (I can’t fornicate, I can’t commit adultery but I can do it in my corner… that kind of a thing nah!)

Every Christian is targeted by Satan!

Every Christian is susceptible to sexual sin!

Your walk with God, your faith, your ability to lead a church, your ability to be a strong spouse and parent, your ability to be a person of honor. All are under attack by sexual sins.

If you are not tempted, beware THAT YOU ARE NOT MOVING IN THAT DIRECTION!

Pray earnestly because this thing is demonic. Whatever is not of God is of the devil. It requires another supernatural power to chase it away. The power is found in Jesus. Eph 6:12: 2Cor 10:4-5 : Rom8:26

Confess God’s word. Remember Jesus rebuked the devil by God’s word. Rev 12:11

Trust in God daily. Target winning per day. If you win today by His power, target winning tomorrow too. One day at a time. Prov 3:5-8

Dont go near anything dirty and say you want to test if God has delivered you… Haba! Thats foolishness.

You cant give the devil a lift, he’s gonna take over the whole drive.

Let’s arise and pray for one another.

If you are hooked already, nothing can deliver you, no one but God and Your determination.

Until you are ready to let go, God watches on.

It’s until you show your fatigue that you allow God to show His strength.

Allow Him! He will help you.

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